« Toward a Positive Justice | Main | Developing a Positive Prison Culture (Part One) »
Positive Justice and Forgiveness
By Kim Workman | February 24, 2009
“Often, different organisations are dealing with victims at different stages of their journey. Sensible Sentencing Trust and Victim Support, have their initial contact with victims shortly after the offence has been committed. Women’s Refuge often deal with people who have been regularly victimised over a period of some years. Prison Fellowship’s encounters tend to take place some years after the initial victimisation – as much as 10 – 15 years in some cases. Victim’s response to the event changes over time. Our experience is that victim’s response to offenders often changes over time – from hurt, fear and anger, to a desire to tell the offender about the harm the offender has caused. It may in time , move to a point where they want to hear the offender’s story – and consider whether they are able to forgive.
Topics: RECAP Newsletters |
One Response to “Positive Justice and Forgiveness”
Comments
You must be logged in to comment, Click here to LOG IN
February 25th, 2009 at 9:34 pm
A reader has offered the following comment:
To say that someone has been “compelled” to forgive is a nonsense. Forgiveness that does not come from the heart is not forgiveness. I recollect a quotation, I cannot remember from whom, “She said she forgave him as a Christian, that is she did not forgive him at all.”
Forgiveness is for the forgiver, not for the forgiven. The only person whose forgiveness is of any help to the offender is himself. When we have offended, feel guilt, what we are feeling is that we have let ourselves down, that we have not lived up to our internal picture of ourselves, we have not behaved as well as we would like to think we normally did. Until we forgive ourselves we will feel guilt, and nothing the victim can say or do will help. In fact, the expression of forgiveness by the victim only serves to underline the fact that we have erred. Oscar Wilde was dead right.
But forgiveness of the offender can do a world of good to the victim, if it comes from the heart and is not just words put into his mouth by some well-meaning person, Christian or otherwise. It lets him move on. I have heard a hundred or more reports by facilitators of RJ conferences, and they have often expressed admiration for the forgiveness shown by the victim. And I have heard many instances of the victim refusing to accept an apology from the offender, because they doubted its sincerity. But I have never heard of a facilitator as much as suggesting that a victim express forgiveness. What would be the point?